, , , , , , , ,
Patrick Walsh

I like to move it. Move it.

Review: Fool's Gold...and Patrick Walsh Live!

posted Friday, 8 February 2008

 FOOL'S GOLD (F)



By the time this review is over, I will have spent more time thinking about Fool's Gold than the writers of its script. This...thing...is one of the sloppiest pictures released by a major studio in recent memory. What can you say about a "romance" with no romance, a "comedy" with no laughs, an "adventure" with no excitement? Though I certainly wasn't rubbing my hands together in anticipation walking in to the theater, I thought this would at least succeed at being an enjoyable time waster. "Attractive people wearing few clothes in exotic locales -- I can handle watching that for a few hours," I thought to myself. But I was wrong. So very wrong. The whole affair is about as compelling as a two-hour fart.

I don't ask a great deal from romantic comedies. I don't need every one to be Annie Hall or When Harry Met Sally or Love, Actually. I don't even need them to be particularly good -- I kinda enjoyed The Holiday, for God's sake! Give me a few laughs, appealing leads, a warm squishy feeling, and you've done your job. Plainly, the makers of Fool's Gold did not do their job. Listen, I know Valentine's Day is coming up, so heed this warning -- if you see this crashing bore of a movie on a first date, your relationship is doomed, cursed even. Do not speak on the way home, avoid eye contact, just go your separate ways and don't speak of the evening again.

For my full Cinematical review of the dreadful Fool's Gold, CLICK HERE

 

Also, here's my two most recent Write Stuff articles, both of which discuss the Writers Guild strike, which appears to finally (FINALLY) be coming to an end...

http://www.cinematical.com/2008/01/30/the-write-stuff-cinematical-readers-argue-the-strike/

http://www.cinematical.com/2008/02/06/the-write-stuff-wga-strike-the-finish-line-is-in-sight/

 

And on Saturday morning, I'll be appearing LIVE on internet radio! Frequent commenter Joe Johnson will be interviewing me about the WGA strike and my writing career, among other things. If you've got a question you'd like him to ask me, you can leave it on the site or even call in to the show. It will be reaired, but if you want to hear the live streaming broadcast, tune in tomorrow at 1:30PM ET/ 10:30 PM PT. HERE'S THE LINK.

tags:              

links: digg this    del.icio.us    technorati    reddit




1. Patrick Walsh left...
Friday, 8 February 2008 12:29 pm

I know we didn't hit 37 comments on the previous post (and for shame! The record on here is a whopping 63!), but I wanted to get the news of that radio show out. Plus, you guys always ask me what it takes for me to give a movie an "F." Now you know!


2. Nutsy Fagan left...
Friday, 8 February 2008 1:52 pm

Wow, someone is finally interviewing you! Cool. I hope it goes well.

I was very surprised to see that you even went to see this movie! I'm beginning to believe that Kate Hudson is not the actress we all thought or hoped she was after Almost Famous. I think that was just luck that she got a crack at a script by by Cameron Crowe...

I used to think McConnaughy was hawt, now I think he's kind of icky. Yeah, his bod's dynamite, but he strikes me as more of a he/she now...and I don't think there is any talent there beside looking purty.


3. Chris Vaughn left...
Friday, 8 February 2008 4:19 pm :: http://vchronicles.wordpress.com/

That movie seems like both actors were on vacation, got bored, and decided to shoot a half-ass movie.


4. Blair left...
Friday, 8 February 2008 11:59 pm

I'm in school for engineering. In my classes there's a guy with long greasy black hair. It's absolutely disgusting and everybody knows it: except him. You can tell from a mere glance at him that that hair is his proudest achievement. He fawns over it more than I fawn over my favourite tv shows when people ask me what they're about.

Matthew McConaughey reminds me of that guy, only instead of his greasy hair being a holy shrine, he treats his entire greasy, sweaty, deodorant-deficient body like that.

I liked him in Contact, though.


5. Nutsy Fagan left...
Sunday, 10 February 2008 10:09 pm

Gotta l1laugh. I just clicked on CNN and one of the headlines was "Hudson, McConnaghey strike gold at box office." Oy.


6. Frances left...
Monday, 11 February 2008 1:07 pm :: http://www.goodforsomething-stilltrying.

Wow, I too just saw that this movie was the weekend's #1. Really makes you think about the title's relevance to viewership!


7. Chris Vaughn left...
Monday, 11 February 2008 3:13 pm :: http://vchronicles.wordpress.com/

Obviously, "Fools" think its "Gold".


8. Patrick Walsh left...
Wednesday, 20 February 2008 3:21 pm

Nutsy,

I have never responded to Kate Hudson, not even in Almost Famous. Don't find her particularly attractive, don't think she's a particularly outstanding actress.

Chris,

Whoa whoa whoa -- half assed? Eighth-assed maybe. MAYBE.

Blair,

You secretly lust for this black-haired adonis, don't you?

Frances,

Yes, society is crumbling all around us.


9. lisa left...
Monday, 31 March 2008 8:33 am

I wish I had read your review before I saw the film. Yeah, big waste of time.