Movies and Politics

First, Cameron Crowe's Elizabethtown. Cameron Crowe is one of the few filmmakers so beloved and distinctive that the general public, not just film snobs, knows him and wants to see what he puts out. Steven Spielberg is probably the best example of this rarity: directors who can open a movie. I'll admit I was excited to see what he had to offer, as Mr. Crowe has made some really sharp, personal and emotional films. Say Anything (A) is one of the best tales of teenage love on record, Fast Times At Ridgemont High (A-) is one of the best tales of teenage sex. Singles (A-) is an underrated analysis of both early 20's love and the early 90's Seattle grunge scene. Jerry Maguire (A), shamelessly sappy thought it may be, is probably one of the great romantic comedies of our time, and Almost Famous (A) is pure gold. Vanilla Sky (C+) is his only true misstep, and, far from horrible, it is kind of an interesting genre experiment that got away from him a bit.

Elizabethtown (C-) gets away from him A LOT. This is the kind of movie that calls a great director's entire career into question, much like Tim Burton's Planet Of The Apes. Apparently the original cut of Elizabethtown was about three hours and widely hated. So Crowe cut some out and threw it at the multiplex. From the first line of the TRULY embarassing opening narration, you know you're in for some trouble. What makes Crowe's movies so special is that he comes at you from the heart. Few directors today put themselves out there so freely, and he excels at it. He has walked that emotional/sap line so cleverly in the past that this movie just looks all the more embarassing.

Not one person in the film speaks anything like anyone has ever spoken before. Every line of dialogue is so polished to be "cute" and "interesting" that it becomes like a high end episode of Dawson's Creek, although I'll be damned if Van Der Beek and the gang didn't affect me more on a weekly basis. This plays like a spoof of Cameron Crowe movies, but even taken as that, it is not funny.

A large portion of the fault here must go to Orlando Bloom. In the case of Elizabethtown he ruined a wreck, but we need to stop him before he destroys a really good movie. I suppose you could say he got where he is on his looks but the two 13 year old girls behind us loudly exclaimed at a key emotional moment, "He is SO ugly!" This was the kind of movie where outbursts like that were welcomed, not frowned upon. Ugly or not, his "acting" made Keanu Reeves look like Al Pacino. His character is supposed to be emotionally dead, I suppose, which the script thankfully makes clear to us because he certainly doesn't. Apparently he took "depressed" to mean "shockingly boring." His face reveals nothing. Every line he utters you can see the gears working overtime to keep his British accent at bay, yanking any sort of feeling out of every single utterance. At several points in the movie, he sounds British anyway, which is distracting and annoying, especially since he is supposed to be playing an American in search of his Southern roots. Orlando Bloom should only play elves and fancy lads, just as Keanu Reeves should only play dumbasses and people in a constant state of wonderment and awe. Bloom sucks so hard in this movie, he puts Jenna Jameson to shame. Miscasting on an epic level.

Kirsten Dunst represents miscasting on a smaller level, but at least her shrill and obnoxious performance is alive, and it does appear that, unlike Bloom, she realized that she was in a feature film. I don't know if anyone could have played her part, really, as the character is given some of the most moronic lines this side of direct-to-video. I suppose Dunsty does what she can with a character who is so disgustingly upbeat she amounts to little more than a cheerleader, and a much less interesting and hot cheerleader than the one she played in Bring It On (B).

Alec Baldwin has a nifty little cameo, and Susan Sarandon has a really nice/bizarre scene at a funeral. Actually, from the funeral on, the movie throws little bits of the greatness that could have been at you. There are some really interesting, memorable images and scenes in that last half hour, but I had been through so much crap at that point, I almost didn't care. The movie runs nearly 2 and a half hours, and you really feel it. I checked my phone like a man on death row waiting to hear from the governor.

Zach Braff's Garden State (B+) treaded pretty much the exact same territory last year with a good deal less pretension, artifice, and icky sappiness. It was also better written, better acted, and better directed. By a first timer.

Kiss Kiss Bang Bang (B) comes out in a few weeks, it is worth checking out. It's a Tarantinan update on the old private eye stories, and has a wonderfully convoluted plot with a lot of really funny comic relief. A little too clever for its own good, and it overdoes the whole narration thing, but it's an interesting movie. It stars Robert Downey Jr. and Val Kilmer, and they work surprisingly well together, despite the fact that both men are clearly insane.

A History Of Violence (B+) is a really smart thriller that works on a lot of levels. Not a scene is wasted, it is short and sharp and extremely well done. It does have some shockingly graphic, (and strangely funny) violence in it, and two humdinger sex scenes. William Hurt gives an extremely weird performance, so weird it seems his role was written for Christopher Walken. Works as a kickass action movie, works as a tense thriller, works as a character study, works as an essay on violence. Works for me.

The Constant Gardener (B) is another really intelligent thriller, but to be blunt, it's pretty slow. The location shots in Africa are incredible, and the "you are there" feeling makes certain passages really zing, but a 15 minute shave would have made this a lot more effective. I will say it is a bit more exciting than what I expected it to be from that title. I assumed a matronly British woman would sit on a patio shaking her head and saying to her husband, "Nigel, you're constantly gardening!" So...more exciting than that anyway. If you want to see a truly great movie by the same director, check out City Of God (A).

How about this story?

http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/9686462

Did you ever see Wag The Dog (B+)? Remember how farfetched that seemed? I think that sort of shit goes on all the time. According to a recent poll, George Bush's approval rating amongst African-Americans is down to 2 percent.  Read it again. 2 percent!

http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-dyn/content/linkset/2005/04/11/LI2005041100879.html

This article says that we need to wait to judge it against future polls, but that is truly shocking. If 98 percent of white people disapproved of the president, he would be impeached in a heartbeat. I guess all we can do now is hope somebody sucks his dick, then they'll throw him out for sure. Hell, I'd do it if it meant saving our country. I tell you, with the prez, the recent talk of more subway bombings, and now this bird flu, it is a scary time to be an American. Of course it's probably scarier to be anything else, so I'll count my blessings.

tags: movies  movie  reviews  politics  

links: digg this    del.icio.us    technorati    reddit